First of July. Agitated.

1. Late last year, Mommy decided to finally give me a ring she has kept for around 40 years now. She knows I love that piece ever since I was kid. I swear sobrang iniingatan ko yun. I won't remove it even when I have to wash my hands at the office. Pero when I was preparing for work this morning, hindi ko siya makita sa usual place niya sa jewelry kit ko. Looked everywhere - WALA! So, I asked everyone I have interacted with last Friday. Two of my officemates assured me I was still wearing it when we were chit-chatting just before going home. He also said he remembers it in my hand when he brought me home. Hindi naman yun puwede mahulog sa car dahil hindi naman yun maluwag. Therefore, suot ko pa siya when I got home. Pero crap. I still couldn't find it. I have to find it. Because even the most expensive ring sold today can never replace it.

2. Today is the first time I ever talked to my boss about a personal matter. A non-work related matter. Ultimate kaba inside the elevator on the way up to her office. Am I sure about telling her about it? Maybe. Maybe she'd appreciate hearing about it from me first. Maybe that's called courtesy. Sa umpisa lang naman siguro yung kaba. At least when I left her office, there's a sigh of relief na. Her advice: Give it time. And I think, yes, that makes sense.

3. It's a sneezy day. I'm supposed to be down with colds and weird throat. But I'm here working on an endless tasklist. I'll be fine. Yeah. It's all in the mind.

I Will Never Let You Down, Verve Pipe

It doesnt matter how it ended or began
Sometimes the best that you can do is change your plans

Across the Universe, The Beatles

Images of broken light which
dance before me like a million eyes
That call me on and on across the universe

Firewoman, Barbie's Cradle

The moons gone down
I know you're still awake
This heart I've found
I didn't intend to break

Sigh.

My parents and I aren't exactly the "bestfriends" type. We have disagreements on a lot of matters - them being the conversative and me being the radical/ liberal in the family. Matters range from choice of clothes to aesthetic taste and style to relationships to society's dangers to religion to politics.

But I would proudly say that my parents did their job really great. I cannot count how many lessons I've learned from them. I swear I'm trying to apply them all but forgive me if my efforts fall short sometimes.

But I think the best and my most favorite of all is FAITH.

Faith, which, I do not exactly equate with religiosity (because religion, for me, is just a philosophy). But faith that just makes me believe that there's Someone up there whom I can hold on to and that everything that happens, whether good or bad, will eventually make wonderful sense in the end.

My parents have made it through the odds for us. I just have to keep believing that I, too, can.

Mommy and Daddy, I love you. I'm proud of you. And I hope I can also make you proud - not for any fancy achievements. But for being able to find and fulfill The Reason that I'm here.

After a "calming" shoot (with sPa music playing on the background), both so tired, nobody wants to decide where to fill our empty tummies. So ever the "indecisive" me, we ended up eating at the first resto/foodspace we'll see with an orange signage, which happened to be an old school dimsum place along one of the streets in Greenhills. The Fried Porkchop and Tofu was great but I've just one "curious" question -

Bakit pag yangchow kailangan marami?

Anybody who's got an interesting answer?

Craving for ice cream brought us to Shell Select
where the food corner looks really appetizing 
and the Nestle freezer has this bite-sized ice cream called Pops (with the cute red container)
and the where toiletries, liquor, and break fluids are arranged accordingly on a shelf
and where one of my mostEST favorite songs/speeches that I had not heard in a long long long time was playing ---

SUNSCREEN

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth; oh nevermind; you will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded. But trust me, in 20 years youll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you cant grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked...Youre not as fat as you imagine.

Dont worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind; the kind that blindside you at 4pm on some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing everyday that scares you

Sing

Dont be reckless with other peoples hearts, dont put up with people who are reckless with yours.

Floss

Dont waste your time on jealousy; sometimes you're ahead, sometimes youre behind...the race is long, and in the end its only with yourself.

Remember the compliments you receive, forget the insults; if you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

Keep your old love letters, throw away your old bank statements.

Stretch

Dont feel guilty if you dont know what to do with your life...the most interesting people I know didnt know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives, some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know still dont.

Get plenty of calcium

Be kind to your knees, youll miss them when theyre gone.

Maybe youll marry, maybe you wont, maybe youll have children, maybe you wont, maybe youll divorce at 40, maybe youll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary...what ever you do, dont congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself either - your choices are half chance, so are everybody elses.

Enjoy your body, use it every way you can...dont be afraid of it, or what other people think of it, its the greatest instrument youll ever own.

Dance...even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room.

Read the directions, even if you dont follow them.

Do NOT read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly.

49 second break in speech -- Quindon singing

Get to know your parents, youll never know when theyll be gone for good. Be nice to your siblings; they are the best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.

Understand that friends come and go, but for the precious few - you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography in lifestyle because the older you get, the more you need the people you knew when you were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard; live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.

Travel.

Accept certain inalienable truths, price will rise, politicians will philander, you too will get old, and when you do you'll fantasize that when you were young prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.

Respect your elders.

Dont expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund, maybe you have a wealthy spouse; but you never know when either one might run out.

Dont mess too much with your hair, or by the time its 40, it will look 85.

Be careful who advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than its worth.

But trust me on the sunscreen...

I love the Orange Bote From Cannes! I'm greatly greatly greatly happy for Armi - where she is now and all the places she's been to. She's one of the people who makes me keep hanging on my aspirations.

I love that I've finally written an intro and objectives for This Thing This Year. Let's continue to keep our fingers crossed. We can do this...yeah...we can.

I love the Chocnut. It makes me miss all my playmates. And also Ms. Vicky.

I love the CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIE (6" in diameter) from Aristocrat. ...i'm confused though....it's UBERsweet and di ba anything in excess is bad...?

It's not until a couple of hours before that I suddenly decided I wanted to take the train to Quezon Ave then jeepney ride to Philcoa on my way to UP. I couldn't explain why. Maybe I miss it.

I decided to take the "Betaway" (slang for better way - it's that asphalted shortcut from AS to Eng) going to the Sunken Garden when we were already in front of AS-casaa side. It's a route I rarely took when I was in UP. I don't know why I decided to take it a while ago.

I wanted to just cross the Sunken Garden on our way back to the car but decided to agree that, yes, maybe it's better to walk on the asphalted acad oval passing by the Gonzalez Hall instead.

I wasn't taking control of my feet when it made me walk to the unfamiliar and rather strange streets of Area2.

I realized that I'm not very rational about the routes that I take. Most of the time, I'm indecisive. That's why sometimes it's late for me to realize the dangers that lie ahead. But then maybe, it's passing through those dangers that makes life exciting.

There's no turning back.

Walk.

And learn along the way.

But what makes me hesitant sometimes? - It's not because of being unsure of the road ahead. It's being unsure about not turning back.

Isang nakakagimbal na tsismis ang nasagap ko kaninang umaga: PALABUNUTAN SA ISANG PUBLIC SCHOOL DITO SA MAKATI CITY.

Hindi nila kayang i-accommodate lahat ng mag-aaral kaya ito ang naisip nilang paraan para sa population control ng paaralan. Kung hindi ka mapalad na mabunot sa raffle draw na ito, maghanap ka na ng ibang paaralan kung saan ka puwedeng suwertihin.

Magkano na nga ba ang tuition fee sa UP ngayon?

Mataas daw ang rate ng economic growth.

Sana may mapaso sa hinihigop niyang mamahaling kape ngayong umaga.